Closed because of Power & Light construction
The Mango Room gets all sorts of laudatory reviews from the local press, and it's not entirely unwarranted. However, after reading both the Pitch and the Star's reference to their cocktail known as a "Bob Marleytini" I was ready to avoid this place forever.
You see, I don't think that naming convention is the slightest bit cool.
Is the Mango Room disneyworld? Am I a child? I'm the kind of person who doesn't order the "Biggie" anything at Wendy's because "Biggie" is a stupid, corporate, cutesy name for "large" and I'm not comfortable saying it out loud just because they want me too. Who decided to make booze drinks cute, anyway? How is that any better than candy-flavored cigarettes? A cocktail, like a cigarette, should taste like what it is. And it should hurt just a little.
Oh, and if it's not clear liquor and vermouth, it's a not a goddamned martini. I don't care what every stupid bar in the Crossroads says.
Moreover, while Mr. Marley was certainly one of the greatest musical artists of the 20th century, he would surely resent this co-opting of his legacy. his music is good, but I abhor everything that he has come to represent in popular American culture. Hippies were just the first annoying subculture to latch on to Marley, but certainly not the last or the most irritating. In high school it was the surfers and the rich kids who smoked pot and fancied themselves rebels while simultaneously driving SUVs and wearing Ralph Lauren shirts. Not long after, Marley's worst nightmare came to pass: the fratboys started to love him. Dave Matthews deserves the fratboys, but poor Marley doesn't. In the case of the Mango Room, I think Bob is appreciated for mostly the right reasons, but the ownership is just not savvy enough to express it in a way I can tolerate. I'm incredibly cool, you see.
Stupid drink names aside, the Mango Room is worth a visit for lunch. In the evening I'm certain the place is riddled with intolerable after work dudes looking for ethnically-indeterminate girlfriends. But for lunch you can eat here for around 10-12 bucks, get waited on with great efficiency and taste some interesting food. The atmosphere is really very nice, but the place is populated mostly by suits.
Oh, and no smoking Mr. Marley.
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2 comments:
Just found your blog...instead of the Mango Room for your Jamaican experience, try G's Jamaican Cuisine, 7940 Troost Ave., I expected Marley himself to walk in at anytime while I was there, atmosphere is the direct opposite of the Mango Room.
excellent suggestion, thanks. Usually I try to stick to downtown where I work, but I live pretty close to G's so I will definitely check it out.
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